Worthy of Pause

A few weeks, I was speaking with a client who was feeling massively overwhelmed. She said "I'm just going to have to give up something. And it makes me so sad, because I love it all. " The heaviness in her energy was palpable.

After offering acknowledgment and presence, I suggested "What would it feel like to take a pause on one of those things. Not to give it up, but just to take a temporary pause as an act of care for herself, as an allowing for space for clarity." Her energy shifted immediately. She said, "I feel so relieved, so light, so suddenly." Her voice changed and she made an easeful shift soon finding answers within herself.

That was Source energy, presence flowing through me, helping people get out of their own way and access their inherent Natural Intelligence as effortless ease and light. The portal to this most often is the pain.

My own journey with pause was and has been profound. Raised in Mumbai, the city that never sleeps, I learned that "she who snoozses, losses." That if you're not always striving or working on something, you are a "kaamchor" (a work shirker). For me that has been the worst thing I could ever be called. Pause was equal to laziness which was equal to unworthiness, being "not enough". And that fuelled all my ambitions, successes and accolades.

Till I came to a place where my system said, "No more." I wasn't burned out, I didnt feel tired or lazy, there was nothing, tangible there. I also learned that when we think "I have to heal", the work is effortful, because ego wants to heal that which is essentially whole, beautiful and full of light. I realised that the obstructions need to be seen and acknowledged and met and that sometimes I need the presence of my teacher to allow it, just as my clients need mine.

One day, my teacher Stu said to me

"Unworthiness needs work

Worthiness needs substantiation"

Read that again. When we feel unworthy or operate from the untruth or illusion that we have to earn worthiness, we "work", we do all the things that we believe will make us worthy. And worthiness in this limited sense needs the substantiation of achievements, accolades, degrees and what not.

I sat with this for days and saw how my whole life had been dominated by this. It was a slowly unfolding, deepling resonating aha moment.

I sat with the pain of feeling I'm "no good" if I'm not doing, planning etc. I let Source as light filled love meet it.

These are 2 transmissions that wrote themselves and I'm sharing with you.

" Have you considred

that you are not lazy

just tired

exhausted even

from doing more to be more

so you can feel worthy

or just be good enough

to meet the standards of those who didnt or don't approve of you

because somewhere they couldnt approve of or love themselves

and somehow you made their standard

the measure of your standard for yourself

forgetting that Source created you worthy,

just by virtue of being.

remember,

discover

the light behind the shadows

for without the light, even shadows wouldnt exist."

"Taking pause

doesnt mean that you are

• losing out

• giving up

• being afraid

Pause can also come from clarity

The trust that doesn’t make you rush

The knowingness that everything has it’s time

and that rushing and busyness are the most socially endorsed acts of fear

Pause

is

powerful."

I am still in opening to pause and its gifts...perhaps you will too.